Focus, the very word we’ve heard all our lives. Ever since we were children and our attention span was still developing. Teachers, Parents etc. were the ones to use the word to teach us to keep our mind on one task until it was complete. As an Author, the word focus is essential to having even the semblance of a writing career.
Let’s start with the definition of Focus:
- The Center of Activity, Attraction or Attention.
- A point of concentration.
- To Concentrate on something or pay particular attention to it.
- The main or central point of something
Whichever way you choose to word it, Focus is a fairly simple word to understand but it is something that can be lost. It’s ironic that adults taught us the word focus when we were kids and as adults we are just as capable of losing it as we were then. We of course have different reasons as adults but it still is something that can be lost. When I was a kid I lost focus mostly when it came to Math. Let’s just say that subject has never been one of my strong suits lol. Lots of people remind themselves on a daily basis to focus on the task at hand. However, in a world full of distractions how does one not lose something that we were told as children was so easy to obtain?
There are many stresses in life as well as choices, so it can be extremely difficult to keep that focus on your goals. I’ve thought about the word Focus a lot lately because I have found it difficult to focus on my writing. So I apologize to all of you for not posting on any of my platforms recently. My life has made it a little more difficult to focus on my writing. I have goals and I remind myself of what I plan for my future success as an Author but it is still difficult to pick one task and stick to it.
I’ve found my mind trying to stretch and focus on too many things at once. While my heart and soul are just begging me to write something, anything. Just to put fingers to keyboard and words to blog right now makes me feel a little of that built up writing tension melt away. Don’t get me wrong, I love to write but sometimes you run out of time to do everything in one day. So prioritizing is important. So when writing doesn’t pay the bills it goes on a back burner for weeks at a time while work deadlines get handled. It’s a shame that we can’t all just get paid to do what we love so it doesn’t feel like work at all.
I could ramble on and on, making excuses for my lack of Focus on my writing career lately but I’m not going to. Before I took a break from writing recently because life has been a little hectic I wrote just the word Focus on a draft for this post. Just a headline. Because I felt myself losing that Focus (I realize I’ve probably over used that word but it’s an important word lol). So I thought that if fell into this writing draught that I would see this blog post with the title all about helping me regain that attention on my goals. I figured if I see it then I will want to write it.
Well, obviously it worked lol. I am writing this to tell you other writers out there that if you have lost that Focus then it’s ok. We all do through our lives. Yes, our attention span have developed so much more since being a child but it doesn’t mean that it is bad to lose Focus. What matters is that you come back to your goals. What matters is that it makes you a stronger person to learn how to reassess and get that ability to Focus back.
As some of you may know from one of my posts earlier this year, I lost my Grandmother. But I never mentioned that I lost her due to Dementia/Alzheimer’s. All those who loved her the most in this world had to watch as she slowly deteriorated to a physical state that is not right for any human being to have to endure. Dementia is a sad, horrible disease that can take a toll on the person and the family around them. It is an awful disease that I do not wish upon anyone. Over the past years my grandmother lost her ability to function, to walk, to speak, to open her eyes, to eat on her own.
In recent years both my husbands parents have also both been diagnosed with Dementia. With my mother in law being the first diagnosed with it. We have been spending more and more time caring for her as her memory and reasoning is what is deteriorating. We have finally been able to get her ready to move to the next stage in her care. She can still function in most ways but her needs will start to change as time goes on. We cannot provide all of the supervision and care she needs. Time is what we need with her, as much as we can get to give her some adventure in her life, where we can focus on making memories with her. She may not remember all of them in the future but we are not ready to let her go yet and we want to see her laugh and smile while she still can.
I saw my grandmother go from her wonderful, singing, dancing, outgoing, incredibly loving self to a vegetable like state. Now in life’s cruel horrible turn of events I get to start the process all over again with someone else that I am very close too. Now, I sound a little selfish. Because it is soooo hard for me but I feel the most sad for my husband. For my husband it feels like what I went through with my grandmother who helped raise me. It causes a crack, if you will, to form in the heart that cannot be patched…It feels like being pierced through the heart and that pressure from the hole that will never heal goes away for a short while but just builds again.
There are good days and then there are bad days where multiple things remind me of my grandma. The good are the happy memories that put a smile on my face when I remember them. The bad are the days when I am reminded of all she went through, the pain that she must have felt, the fear and sadness. My husband is the one who I am saddened for the most aside from my mother in law of course, in my mind and heart I worry more for him than myself. No one wants to see their love lose a parent in any way, let alone in a painfully sad and slow deteriorating way.
I would be a liar to say that being around my Mother in law isn’t a reminder of what my grandma went through in the beginning. It opens up the wound in my heart every single time I am around her. But that is something I try to put from my mind the best I can because I love her and want to spend those moments with her.
I am just having trouble focusing on writing right now. Family comes first and if you gotta stretch yourself a little thin to help them, then it’s what you do. I have been trying to find every minute I can to write even though it hasn’t been much lately. Reading has increased a bit though and I firmly believe that reading also doubles as research to better your writing skills. So I apologize to all of my followers on here that I have been so absent on here lately.
I have told you all this information about things going on in my life not for sympathy but for awareness. I know Alzheimer’s awareness month is in June, so it’s already passed for the year but I firmly believe that it doesn’t have to be a certain month to raise awareness for a cause. Many people out there are impacted by Dementia and Alzheimer’s on a daily basis, whether it is themselves or through care of a family member. So that being said before my closing paragraph here I hope that you would kindly take the time to learn more about this disease or even donate to help with medical research for a cure and so much more with the following link… Thank you to those of you who take the time to do so and to those of you already doing something to raise awareness for such an unforgiving disease. The link is https://www.alz.org
Life comes at you fast (to quote a very common over used phase that is entirely true). So you can lose focus without meaning to but make sure you find a way to get back on the path to your dreams. I have mentally been punishing myself for not making time for what I love to do. I have been trying to regain some of that focus. This is a reminder to myself as well as others who need the reminder to focus on what you love to do. It doesn’t have to be today, or even tomorrow but try to find the time in your busy life to make time for your future.
Thank you for reading my blog…Until Next Time…JUST KEEP WRITING.
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